Getting More Serious - Fondling Notes

Really, really make sure that you're ready to be touched before you agree to do it. Never get into fondling if you're uncomfortable or unsure about it, or because your partner talked you into it or pressured you. It can really make you feel unhappy and uncomfortable about yourself for years afterwards. Kissing is AMAZINGLY erotic and there's no reason to move on from kissing if you are enjoying the kisses!

But let's say that you are already kissing quite a bit and you BOTH really want to do something more. The next stage is "Second Base", or "feeling up", i.e. touching each other. As touching below the waist gets into the sexual organs and therefore is some form of sex, "Second Base" only involves above the waist touching.

Be Somewhere Quiet and Secluded
This is a REALLY big step for most couples and you don't want to be interrupted!! No siblings around, no friends to walk in. Make sure that you are definitely alone. Make sure you both ARE ready and sure about this, and wanting it. And make sure you built up to this through all the other stages so you're already comfortable with each other and with touching in general.

Start with the Clothes On
If you're already comfortable touching each other's arms, which you SHOULD be, then start there. But now start running your hands up to the shoulders. Give each other long, luscious back massages. That will get you really in the mood, relaxed and fully comfortable with touching each other.

Now Go to the Oils
Candlelight and low lights are good about now. Everybody is self conscious about how they look, so you want to give each other the benefit of the shadows. Now while doing the massage, slide their shirt up (they're face down) and use a bit of massage oil on their bare skin. The massage oil is the "excuse" for not doing this through their clothes any more. Give them a long, sensual massage with the shirt pulled up to their shoulders. That might be enough for one session, it would leave them really wanting more and looking forward to next time! The anticipation is KEY. You want you both to be really wanting to continue, and to be looking forward to what will happen next.

Massaging the back to massaging the front
Now that you're already enjoying and looking actively forward to a long, oiled back massage with candlelight, the next time, slide your hands down on the SIDES of your partner's body. This is 'new' but still part of the wonderful sensations. And now you can slide your hand around to the front of their body and while it is 'different' it is still not a "huge scary" step now. It's just a normal progression of good things from the back to the front. Now the shirt can come off completely and you can both give each other full top massages.