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Getting Into Things - Kissing Techniques

Make sure that you and your partner are fully Comfortable with each other and have gone through the First Kiss before you move on to other kissing. The key to delicious kissing is to be totally lost in each other and comfortable with each other. This isn't something that just "happens" - it's something that the two of you develop over time.

Kissing Basics
There is NO right or wrong way to kiss. Every person kisses differently. And everybody likes to be kissed differently! So your true aim is to find out what style YOU enjoy, and then what style your MATE enjoys and how to meld the two. Some like gentle kisses. Some like passionate kisses. Some like dry kisses. Some like wet, sloppy kisses. If your last girlfriend said you were an awful kisser, it just means you weren't her style. Your next girlfriend could think you are a FABULOUS kisser, even if you kiss in exactly the same way.

FOCUS on the person you are kissing. You shouldn't be distracted or absent minded or humming a song. The person you're kissing will want to feel like this kiss is really special.

Also, hopefully it goes without saying, brush your teeth and gargle! You want VERY fresh breath if someone is going to up near it. Don't put on lots of gloss or lipstick. The kiss shouldn't be gooey, it should be skin on skin.

Start with the Cheek
When you're near the person (standing or sitting) and ready for the kiss, it's good to start with a cheek-kiss. That's an "innocent kiss" and a "you're special" move. Either the boy OR the girl can do this. Squeezing his/her hand at the same time is another way of saying "you're special". You can see if your partner likes this, or feels uncomfortable. If they're uncomfortable, no big deal, just stay at that level until the comfort comes back again, maybe in a few days or a week or two.

Move On to the Lips
If you've done the cheek kiss first like you should have, you've already shown your partner that "it's ok to kiss". Think of it as training you both to learn new behaviors :) So Kissing is Good. Now you're just changing your kissing method. Instead of going for the cheek, go for the lips.

Again, be soft. Your first lip kisses should be slow, langorous, gentle, with a closed mouth. Press your lips gently against your partner's, and savor the sensation of their skin against your own. Just hold it for a few moments, then release. Always show how much you enjoy these steps, with a smile or a sigh. Your partner will always be nervous about "did I do that well enough?" Show them that they did, so they are encouraged to do it again!

Close Mouthed to Open Mouthed
The first big step in kissing progression is to go from the normal 'hello/goodbye' closed-mouthed kiss to an open-mouthed kiss. You do this with your tongue. When you're close-mouthed kissing in a quiet, relaxed area, now tickle your tongue against their lips. Do it in a gentle, teasing way, as if you're saying "Hello ... let me in ..." Eventually slide your tongue gently into your partner's mouth, just a little. Do little, gentle experimentive probes. Your partner will be wondering, "What will happen next?" You want that to be an exciting thing, not a nervous thing. So go slowly. Tickle your partner's lip, and then tongue. Now draw your partner's tongue into your own mouth.

French Kissing
French Kissing is the more erotic style of open mouthed kissing. It is in essence kissing that brings to mind parts of the full sex act, so therefore is very arousing because of the mental images it causes. Either the guy or girl can do this. First, take your tongue and make slow, gentle circles around your partner's tongue. Go slowly at first, then more and more quickly. Then plunge your tongue down along your partner's tongue, sliding down it until your tongue is fully extended. Do that one or two times, then slowly slide your tongue back out and start with the gentle circling again.

Your Hands
You don't want your hands to be all over creation during this kind of kissing - it's distracting!! There's plenty of time to do hand stuff later on. Right now you're doing amazing things with your tongue and you want that to be the focus. Your tongue can be MUCH more erotic than your hands could be. So keep your hands up around their head, cupping the back of their head, rubbing along their necks and shoulders, running it thorugh their hair, pulling their back so they are pressed into you. The more you focus the attention solely on your mouth and tongue, the stronger the impact will be.

When you're Done
Don't run off! Your partner is probably thinking, "That was great, what does he/she think?" You want to leave a POSITIVE impression. Pull back slowly. Look into your partner's eyes. Smile. Sigh. Don't laugh, even if you're nervous. Think of a calm after a storm, and just murmur something encouraging like "wow" or "that was *nice*" or just the person's name.


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